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The Shameless Mom Academy

Sara Dean launched the Shameless Mom Academy to help moms lead more positive, powerful and purposeful lives #everydamnday. Sara is an award winning fitness professional, author, speaker, and transformation coach who spent the last 16+ years serving moms in the fields of psychology, sociology, health & wellness. But, it took becoming a mom herself in 2012 to learn that - holy cow - this is hard work, and if you’re not paying attention you can completely lose your own sense of identity while raising babies. Join Sara every Monday and Wednesday as she and her notable guests (such as Gretchen Rubin, Carrie Wilkerson, JJ Virgin, Susan Hyatt, Cathy Heller, Nichole Nordeman, Melanie Shankle, and Jadah Sellner) dig deep into topics like creating the confidence you crave; turn your struggles into strengths, building better boundaries, and tuning into tiny habits that can change your life. Discover how why thousands of moms all over the world are turning to The Shameless Mom Academy to live bigger, bolder, braver lives #everydamnday.
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Now displaying: July, 2019
Jul 31, 2019

Anne Moss Rogers is a TEDx speaker and owner of the popular Emotionally Naked blog. She is a social media and content marketing expert who turned into an 'accidental leader' as a suicide prevention advocate after her son Charles, who suffered from depression and addiction, died by suicide in June 2015.

She has been interviewed by the New York Times and was the first suicide loss survivor ever invited to speak at the National Institute of Mental Health. Her blog, Emotionally Naked which focuses on subjects including suicide, grief, addiction, and mental illness reached over a half million views in its first three years. She has written a book, Diary of a Broken Mind that includes her son’s song lyrics, which will publish October 2019.

Listen in to hear Anne Moss share:

  • The warning signs of his son’s depression and anxiety
  • The days and events leading up to her son’s death
  • How she feels comforted and connected to Charles when she’s on stage talking about his death
  • How she finds purpose in her day to day life after losing her child
  • How she is leveraging technology and the internet to save the lives of actively suicidal people

Links Mentioned:

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • Embr: Go to Embr and Save $50 with code SHAMELESS at checkout.
  • Lovevery: Save $15 off your Play Kit subscription at Lovevery and use the code SHAMELESS at checkout. Offer good until 10/31.
Jul 29, 2019

Women are raised to believe we should make other people comfortable.  We should be caretakers of others needs and desires and feelings - even when it comes at a cost to our own needs, desires, and feelings.

Because of this indoctrination early in our lives, we also take it upon ourselves to make sure that we don’t outshine others - because that could make them feel bad or less than.  Instead, we let ourselves feel bad and less than. 

We make it a priority to make other people comfortable.  And in many cases this means we shrink and play small in front of others.  We don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable and we certainly don’t want anyone to judge us for shining too brightly. 

So, we stay small, quiet, dull, demure instead - because showing up as bold, bright, big, brave feels too risky.

Here are some instances in which you might make others uncomfortable with your shininess and badassery, as well as put yourself at risk of other people’s judgment:

  • when you lose weight
  • when you run a 5K, 10K or a marathon
  • when you quit your job to stay home with your kids
  • when you make a lot of money
  • when you write a book
  • when you start your own business
  • when you go for a promotion
  • when you go back to school to get an advanced degree
  • when you put your child in full-time childcare
  • when you go on an epic vacation
  • when you take every Friday off
  • when you get weekly massage
  • when you buy your kid something fancy/”spoil” them
  • when you buy a bigger house
  • when you buy a tiny house
  • when you announce you’re a photographer/event planner/jewelry designer/lifecoach/blogger/podcaster, speaker, writer
  • when you say you want to be a mogul

Have you ever achieved one of these items and intentionally not shared it with others?  You kept is small and private out of fear that others would be uncomfortable with your success or achievement and/or that they might pass judgment on you and dull your shine?

I want to encourage you to reframe how you think about other people's opinions.  It’s not your job to tend to other people’s opinions.  In fact, you should pay them no mind.

It’s not your job to make other people comfortable.  Their discomfort is about them, not you.  And it’s their responsibility, not yours.

It’s not your job to play small and stay small because others can’t or won’t step up and shine.

Your job is to SHINE LIKE A MOTHER.

And when you do so you will become a mirror that attracts people who want to see you in all your big, bold, brave badassery.  When you start attracting these kinds of people, you will continue to be able to shine in brighter ways for all your days.

Listen in for a deeper dive and 4 ways to deal with the uncomfortable, judgy people in your life.

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • Talkspace: To match with your perfect therapist for a fraction of the price of traditional therapy, go to Talkspace, Make sure to use the code SHAMELESS to get $65 off your first month and show your support for the show.
  • Rothy’s: To get free shipping on any order of Rothy’s shoes, as well as free returns, go to Rothy’s and use the code SHAMELESS at checkout.
Jul 24, 2019

Susan Hyatt is a master certified life coach who has helped thousands of women to

transform their bodies and lives. She’s the author of Bare, creator of the Bare Process, the Bare Deck, the Bare Podcast, and an online community called Bare Daily. With her fiery Facebook rants—including “Whoop Ass Wednesday,” where she reads a fresh batch of hate mail from Internet trolls and gives her sassiest response—Susan has gained an international following of women who love her honesty, humor, and fearlessness. Susan has been featured in Cosmopolitan, Woman’s World, Seventeen, and O: The Oprah Magazine, and was a Finalist for the Athena Award, honoring her work in the field of women’s empowerment.

Listen in to hear Susan share:

  • How she caught herself in cycles of emotional eating and how she stopped the cycle
  • How she moved from body hate into body love
  • How and why quitting diet culture will bring you more success (and more money)
  • The role of the patriarchy in inspiring her body love
  • How to use pleasure power instead of willpower to lose weight
  • Replacement habits for comfort and joy that don’t involve emotional eating or drinking
  • The importance of radical self-love and compassion and FUN in any achieving any goal

Links Mentioned:

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • Brooklinen: Get 10% off AND free shipping when you use promo code SHAMELESS at Brooklinen.
  • Simple Health: Simple Health provides a more convenient and affordable way to get birth control. Go to Simple Health and enter the code shameless at checkout to have your $20 prescription fee waived.
  • Fabfitfun: To get $10 off your first subscription box (making it only $39.99 for $200 worth of products) go to Fabfitfun and use the code SHAMELESS at checkout.
Jul 22, 2019

The truth about confidence is that it REQUIRES courage. 

If you take a good look back at your life, I bet you’ll see a clear connection between the times that you took courageous action and the defining moments when you became more confident.  You’ll likely notice that these moments all involved:

  • getting uncomfortable
  • doing it scared
  • pushing yourself further than you’ve ever gone
  • facing fears head-on

Some examples of this might include:

  • Applying for a new, higher-level job
  • Signing up for a 5K, 10K, marathon
  • Speaking up in the face of injustice
  • Reporting an abuser
  • Asking for a raise
  • Setting a firm boundary with a family member or long-time friend
  • Moving across the country
  • Leaving an abusive relationship
  • Showing up to an event where you don’t know anyone
  • Traveling alone
  • Skydiving or bungee jumping
  • Climbing a mountain
  • Having a baby
  • Advocating for your child’s needs
  • Starting a business
  • Leaving your marriage
  • Fixing your marriage
  • Starting a blog
  • Asking for help
  • Finding a therapist or coach
  • Getting healthy

Courage is contagious.  When you do one courageous thing and subsequently build a little confidence, you automatically start looking for more opportunities to be courageous.  Over time, you build momentum around being an action taker and dream chaser who enjoys the discomfort that comes with courageous action because you know the outcome will be a more confident sense of self, a more joy-filled life, and a world with bigger dreams realized.

When you don’t take courage action on a regular basis, you become complacent.  You don’t see yourself as someone who can grow or meet new goals. You feel stuck, unmotivated, uninspired.  This is painful. 

So, choose your pain. 

The pain of complacency or the pain of courageous action.  One has a much more positive and powerful outcome. 

Tune in to hear 7 ways to build courage that will train your brain to take courageous, confident, life-changing action on a regular basis.

Links Mentioned:

  • Enroll in MOMENTUM Mamas and get a complimentary ticket to Shameless Mom Con 2020: Momentum

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • BruMate: Right now, Brumate is giving my listeners a special discount of 15% off your first order when you go to BruMate and use our code SHAMELESS, that's BruMate.
  • Openfit: Join the Openfit 30-day challenge and get a special extended 30-day free trial membership to Openfit when you text SHAMELESS to 303030.
Jul 17, 2019

Laura Cathcart Robbins is a Shameless Mom, a writer, and a recovery thriver and survivor. In September 2018 she found herself in an all too familiar situation.  She was the only one in the room.  She was the only black woman in the room at Brave Magic, a famed writer’s retreat. After it was over, she wrote about her ‘only one’ experience in The Huffington Post and comments started flooding into her DM from people from all races, ethnicities, creeds, and nationalities who had felt ‘othered.’

Laura now hosts the podcast, The Only One In The Room, where she interviews a person about their ‘only one’ story each episode.  On her show, you’ll hear raw, vulnerable, accounts from people who are like most of us.  Laura’s hope is that The Only One In The Room will inspire a change of perspective in how we all see and hear each other’s stories. She hopes to make you think twice before judging the person standing next to you at a party, in the pick-up line at school or in a crowded subway car. Laura’s show and her work is for anyone who has ever felt alone in a room full of people – which is to say, her show and her work are for everyone.

Listen in to hear Laura share:

  • What it’s like to be the only black person in the room in 2018
  • The difference between visible only-ness vs invisible only-ness - like addiction, divorce, infertility, having a child with special needs
  • What it feels like to be the only one in the room and how we’ve all been the only one in the room at some point
  • The isolation of onlyness - and the antidote
  • How to create opportunities and cultivate your biggest gifts from your onlyness

Links Mentioned:

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • Get access to MOMENTUM Mamas and Shameless Mom Con 2020 during our wild & crazy Christmas in July event (starting July 20!) Get on our newsletter email list for full details: News Letter
  • Native: For 20% off your first purchase, visit Native and use promo code shameless at checkout.
  • Stamps: Right now, my listeners get a special offer that includes a 4-week trial PLUS free postage AND a digital scale without any long-term commitment. Just go to Stamps, click on the Microphone at the TOP of the homepage and type in SHAMELESS.
Jul 15, 2019

As you grow and evolve in different areas of your life it is imperative that you build support systems that serve you.  This doesn’t typically happen by chance.  It happens by design. 

While this takes effort and often vulnerability, the value of safe and sacred support systems is immeasurable.

It is common to make the mistake of leaning on one person or one group for all your needs.  If you want to be really well supported it’s important to have multiple networks and support systems to lean into. 

Here are some of my networks/support systems (in random order):

  • Mom friends
  • Female entrepreneur friends
  • Podcaster friends
  • Running/workout/training friends
  • Forever Friends (high school/college)
  • My marriage

The purpose of these different support systems is that you need different networks to connect with people who are in the same place at the same time with the same needs, dreams, and interests.  As you listen to this episode, you’ll learn why it’s not reasonable or wise to lean on one person or one group for all your needs.

It’s so important to build these support systems because:

  • You must have a place to shine
  • You must have a safe place to be seen as you grow
  • You must have sacred places to connect with like-minded people

All of this preserves your mental health, improves your sense of worth, and helps you build a more dynamic identity.  AND all of this helps you minimize and mitigate loneliness, isolation, depression, and anxiety.

Listen in to learn:

  • How to build support systems that serve you
  • How to release relationships that don’t allow you to shine
  • Why some people are no longer your people and how to be ok with that
  • Where to find your squad and how to connect with them

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • Get access to MOMENTUM Mamas and Shameless Mom Con 2020 during our wild & crazy Christmas in July event (starting July 20!) Get on our newsletter email list for full details: News Letter
  • Scary Mommy Speaks podcast
Jul 10, 2019

Kim Strobel is a teacher, a consultant, a speaker, a happiness coach, and an aspiring author. But her personal life is just as full. When she’s not firing up educators with her signature mix of excitement and experience, she’s a die-hard runner, an advocate for her community’s abandoned animals, and a family-oriented gal who loves spending time with her husband Scott, their four children, two grandkids, and three pups.

It’s tempting to believe that the Chief Happiness Officer herself has never known a down day. But the truth is, sometimes you have to live through darkness before you can thrive in the light.

Kim spent her childhood and teen and young adult years dealing with panic attacks and crippling fear. Diagnosis of a seizure disorder and full panic disorder followed and with them a burgeoning fear that she would never be able to achieve her dreams. 

Listen in to hear how Kim overcame her crippling panic disorder and what her life looks like today - as a Happiness Coach, who is not immune to panic attack relapses.

Listen in to hear Kim share:

  • How she endured 8 years living with panic disorder, having 25 panic attacks a day at times
  • How medical intervention and CBD therapy saved her life
  • How to retrain your brain toward happiness
  • 50% of your long term happiness is genetic, 10% is external circumstances, 40% is self-controlled/self-managed
  • Top 5 happiness habits
  • What your kids are really see when you show up imperfectly

Links Mentioned:

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • Scary Mommy Speaks podcast
  • Openfit: Join the Openfit 30-day challenge and get a special extended 30-day free trial membership to Openfit when you text SHAMELESS to 303030.
Jul 8, 2019

There is a huge difference between dreaming and doing.  Yet, sometimes we confuse the two. 

Dreaming lives in your head and your heart.

Dreaming doesn’t have a plan.

Dreaming is passive.

Dreaming doesn’t have a start date.

Dreaming doesn’t keep you accountable.

Dreaming is not an accomplishment.

Dreaming is picture perfect and linear, a series of perfect steps that take you to a perfect destination.

Dreaming is future-oriented.  It’s about later… when you have time when the kids are older when the circumstances are juuuuust so.

Dreaming is outcome focused.

Dreaming feels indulgent and delightful, like something you might not even be worthy of.

In contrast…

Doing is your dream in action.

Doing is a plan.

Doing has a start date, as well as an end date.

Doing keeps you accountable.

Doing is an accomplishment.

Doing is not linear, its a series of highs and lows and lefts and rights and a few wrong turns that take you to a beautifully imperfect place that you’re ridiculously proud of.

Doing is action oriented.

Doing is present-oriented, not future-oriented.

Doing is step focused - not outcome focused - where you’re always considering, “what is my next right step?”

Doing feels scary, exciting, nerve-wracking, determined, and disciplined.

Dreaming definitely serves a purpose.  It provides:

  • Hope
  • Vision
  • Clarity
  • Joy
  • Escape

Doing serves a transformative experience:

  • Sense of pride
  • Sense of momentum
  • Sense of accomplishment
  • Increased self-worth
  • New/evolved sense of identity

At the crux of dreaming vs doing is a lot of decision making.  I would argue that decisiveness is the biggest struggle of doing.  Making decisions toward your dreams (the doing) can be crippling.  But for the doing to take place, the decisions must be made.  You must become a DECISION MAKER AND AN ACTION TAKER.  It is the only path to your dreams.  Listen in to hear how to learn how to become a better decision maker and action taker - in order to be a DOER who realizes all her dreams. 

Links mentioned:

Shameless Mom Con WaitList

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • Third Love: To find the perfect fitting bra and get 15% off your first purchase got to Third Love
  • BarkBox: Get a FREE EXTRA MONTH of Barkbox with any 6 or 12-month subscription by visiting BarkBox
Jul 3, 2019

Katie Goodman is an award-winning musical comedian, author, speaker, and life-coach. She is a nationally touring keynote speaker on the topic of using the tools of improv comedy in everyday life.

Her musical comedy show, “Broad Comedy,” runs Off-Broadway and tours across the country. She has been seen on Showtime, on Current TV, and on TruTV. Her comedy videos, having amassed 3 million views, can be viewed online. She received a Time Out New York Critic’s Pick for Best Cabaret and is signed with Comedy Dynamics, North America’s largest independent record label. Her album “Halfway Closer To Dead” is available on iTunes.  As a keynote speaker, workshop leader and trainer, Katie has taught over 10,000 people the art of improvisational comedy. She writes for O Magazine and is the author of Improvisation For The Spirit: Living A More Creative, Spontaneous and Courageous Life Using The Tools of Improv Comedy. And you’ll definitely want to check out her podcast, The Improvised Life with Katie Goodman. 

Listen in to hear Katie share:

  • How you’re already using improvisation in your life - and how to use it more to your advantage
  • Why learning improvisation is a valuable life skill
  • How to practice getting lost and living in unpredictability - especially if you’re a control freak
  • How to live more authentically by refusing to compete
  • How to use improv to change your parenting game
  • The magic of creating space in moments where you feel you have no control

Links mentioned:

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • Talkspace: To match with your perfect therapist for a fraction of the price of traditional therapy, go to Talkspace, Make sure to use the code SHAMELESS to get your first week free and show your support for this show.
  • Simple Health: Simple Health provides a more convenient and affordable way to get birth control. Go to Simple Health and enter the code shameless at checkout to have your $20 prescription fee waived.
  • Rothy’s: To get free shipping on any order of Rothy’s shoes, as well as free returns, go to Rothy’s and use the code SHAMELESS at checkout.
Jul 1, 2019

I have recently had multiple mamas reach out to me to ask me to do an episode on self-worth.

AND I’ve been repeatedly noticing that questioning one’s worthiness is a common stumbling block for a number of my coaching clients.  In fact, perhaps the most common stumbling block.

When it comes to self-worth, we need to look at a few things:

  • Why do you feel a lack of worth?
  • What is at the root of your struggles with self-worth?
  • How is lack of worth showing up in your life?
  • How is lack of worth holding you back in life?
  • What are the dangerous risk factors of not cultivating a strong sense of self-worth?
  • What simple action steps can you take to improve your self-worth?

Cultivating a strong sense of self-worth can take time - as many of us have been sitting in self-doubt and grappling with negative self-talk for years, maybe decades.  But when you start to identify the root of your struggles and see some of the patterns around poor self-worth in your life, it can quickly become clear how you can change course. 

Changing course doesn’t have to be big and overwhelming.  It can be small, simple steps you take to integrate a more positive and powerful sense of self into your identity. And this can be SO FREEING.  In this episode, I walk you through 9 such steps. 

So, let’s get to it, shall we?

Let’s all step up and step into our badassery. 

Links mentioned:

Thank you to our sponsors:

  • Care: To save 30% off a Care.com Premium membership— visit Care when you subscribe.
  • care of: For 30% off your first month of personalized care/of vitamins, visit Take Care Of and enter the code SHAMELESS30 at checkout.
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