I could not be more grateful to each and every guest who joined me in the SMA in 2018. So many of these interviews had BIG impact. A wanted to share a variety of the episodes I found to be the most impactful in 2018 – based on the guest's stories, my experience with the interview, and your feedback on these episodes.
If you missed any of these, go listen NOW. If you want to know which episodes are worth a second listen, it’s these ones. Enjoy!
Episode 194 with Andrea Owen: Your Kick-Ass Life
How women hold ourselves back from happiness and numb ourselves with food, alcohol, TV and social media.
Episode 210 with Kelly Herron: Not Today Mother F*cker
How she survived a vicious attack and used her terrifying story to become a warrior.
Episode 238 with Dana Malstaff: Divorce, Proactive Crying, and Getting Naked
How getting to know herself better led her to divorce and a new sense of hope.
Episode 240 with Debbie Reber: Differently Wired
The pervasiveness of Differently Wired kids and how we can be more supportive of their gifts, talents, and strengths
Episode 244 with Dr. Jenny Yip: Coping with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
Her story of OCD in different phases of her life and how she helps treat other moms and kids with OCD and anxiety.
Episodes 246 and 248 Danny J: Saved By The Daughter She Placed For Adoption Part 1 and Part 2
How having a baby and placing her for adoption at 16 saved her from her eating disorder, depression and suicidal ideation
Episode 264 with Jessica Butts: Front Seat Life
How knowing and embracing your personality type can change the course of your life
Episode 270 with Nichole Sylvester: Surviving Abuse, Addition, and Murder
How she addiction and abuse, and hit rock bottom when her ex-boyfriend murdered a woman in her home
Episode 280 with Courtney Shorter: Grief, Joy, and Soul Free Mamas
How her 10-year infertility journey led to a brain tumor, the loss of twin baby girls, and ultimately her sweet boy, Hendrix.
Episode 284 with Rachel Rodgers: Million Dollar Badass
How she emerged from a childhood impacted by poverty, addiction, mental health issues, and the loss of her father at the age of 12 to become a 7 figure earner. And why she firmly believes all women should aim to be 7 figure earners.
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Karen has over 30 years of experience working with couples and families facing transition, loss, growth and change. Her work as a Collaborative Divorce Coach spurred her determination to write “The Co-Parenting Handbook” with Kristin Little, Child Specialist. Parents learn the best ways to support their children, strengthen their co-parenting, and discover the necessary tools to skillfully create a two-home family.
“The Parenting Plan Workbook” followed with contributor Felicia Malsby Soleil, JD. And most recently, Karen and Patricia Papernow, PhD released The Stepfamily Handbook, for parents ready to date and hoping to one day successfully create a stepfamily.
As a teacher, trainer, facilitator, Karen played an instrumental role in developing the year-long facilitator training program for the Compassionate Listening Project. As a certified Compassionate Listening trainer, Karen utilizes this heart-centered approach to authentic speaking and capable listening used around the world in high-conflict situations such as Israel/Palestine. Her deep listening skills make all the difference working with co-parent pairs in conflict as they find their way through the pain of divorce into a future with optimism.
Listen in to hear Karen share:
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With just a few days left in 2018, I wanted to take a minute to reflect on my biggest shifts of the year. I have to tell you, when I sat down to think about this I had no idea what I would come up with.
I am so glad I did this exercise, as it allowed me to see a lot of growth and triumph. I can close the door on this year knowing I stretched myself in a number of powerful ways and I’ve laid the groundwork to do more of the same in 2019. Cause a girl’s growing is never done!
I’m really excited to share my 5 Biggest Shift of 2018 with you. Although, if I’m being honest, a couple of these made me pretty uncomfortable, which you’ll hear me express as I talk through them. In fact, one of them I didn’t even want to talk about. But you know I’m not about holding back. So you get to be in on ALL OF IT.
What have your biggest shifts in 2018 been? I would LOVE to hear from you!
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Radiah Rhodes is a visionary, entrepreneur, designer, engineer, and coach. After two decades of experience leading small businesses and Fortune 100 companies in the beauty and information technology industries, Radiah became known for her strategic insights, impeccable design aesthetic, and natural ability to connect, lead, and get results. She has led and coached many executives and organizations to deliver exceptional business results and launched a strong portfolio of multi-million dollar products and services around the globe.
Most recently Radiah authored the book, Being is the New Doing: A Divine Guide to Owning Your Energy, Time and Peace of Mind. She also launched a collection of brands and products designed to transform and expand your intention and well-being.
As an entrepreneur, corporate leader, wife, and Shameless Mom to two amazing and active children, Radiah knows what it takes to be extraordinary in life and leadership. She trains clients on how to tap into and leverage their intention as the fuel and fire to create any desired outcome with ease and authenticity.
Listen in to hear Radiah share:
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Raise your hand if you’re a quitter!
Oh, you’re not??
Fantastic.
While it’s likely that you wouldn’t identify as a quitter, you probably feel like quitting things on a regular basis.
Annnnd, it's possible you actually do quit things sometimes – maybe even on a regular basis.
We quit diets and workout programs and books and friendships and jobs and clubs and committees and marriages. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes quitting is 100% the right move. See link below for my episode on the merits of being a quitter!
But, sometimes we need to pull up our big girl pants and SHOW UP and POWER THROUGH and DO HARD THINGS.
On these days, when we can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel and we’re not sure there will ever be a pay off for our valiant efforts, we need some skills to keep us going.
This episode will give you the skills you need to keep moving forward, to keep taking action, to prove to yourself that you are a powerful, resilient, tenacious badass who gets what she wants and needs out of life. Cause you actually ARE that lady already. I know it. Let me show you.
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Jody is the Shameless mom, a wife, and a nature lover. She’s a two-time Amazon bestselling author of “Let Love in 101; A Practice Guide to Happiness” and her most recent book “Mommy Reboot; A Busy Mom’s Guide to Self-Care”.
Jody is a self-care coach working exclusively with busy moms who want to feel less overwhelmed and more fulfilled and she’s known in her industry for transforming the lives of moms through the art of self-care.
She’s the face behind the Mommy Reboot Facebook group, a rapidly growing worldwide community of busy moms who are passionate and determined to be a good mom by taking care of themselves.
Jody’s vision is for a world where women around the globe are caring for and nurturing themselves as easily as they do for their children and families.
She believes that “self-care can no longer be a cutesy catchphrase, it must be...a movement...a revolution, and a new way of living for the modern day woman.”
Listen in to hear Jody share:
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Songfinch: To save $20 off your Personalized Song From Scratch, go to Songfinch and use the code SHAMELESS at checkout.
Let’s get really clear about something real quick…
You deserve to enjoy your holidays.
You deserve to eat the cookies.
You deserve to drink the nog.
You deserve to live it up and laugh out loud and love lots in all the ways that fill your soul.
AND, you deserve to do all this guilt-free.
That said, I want you to be mindful and intentional about what truly brings you joy.
I want you to be aware of delightful indulgence vs mindless consumption.
For me, delightful indulgence is:
For me, delightful indulgence is NOT:
Because I know what my delightful indulgences are, I am careful to prioritize those things. In fact, I often pass up a lot of other things to make space for these delightful indulgences. I’ll skip the nog in order to enjoy the red. I’ll pass on the cookies to enjoy every bite of the cake. I’ll switch to club soda after 2 glasses of wine so I will sleep well. I’ll decide which days I’m wearing PJs all day, so I can also determine which days I’m getting up to go running.
Determine your delightful indulgences. Then make space for them. Then, say NO to the things that are not as awesome as your delightful indulgences. Don’t be in constant consumption mode. Be in thoughtful consumption mode. You will enjoy every bit of your holidays more.
Tune into this episode to get specific pointers on how to be intentional around your delightful indulgences so you can spend your holidays in delighted JOY.
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Fortune is a Shameless Dad and the oldest of two kids. These things should have made him a responsible, motivated leader – which he is today. But his road to get here reads differently…
Although he graduated from university with honors & an opportunity to play professional baseball, he chose to become an accountant for the government. But, the government wasn’t challenging enough for his active imagination. So, he started studying successful people and decided that’s what he wanted to do with his life.
It was at this point that his life changed. It got much worse before it got better. Financial success in real estate revealed emotional & mental wounds that needed healing. Before he could make those shifts in mindset, he battled addiction, 5 felony charges, and found himself facing a potential 12-year prison sentence.
He then wrote a book about his journey & the lessons he learned along the way. As a father, coach, author, & speaker, Fortune brings a unique approach to understanding the wisdom of living a purpose-driven life. You’ll learn from him not only the practical steps for improving the major areas of your life; but also the scientific evidence & spiritual elements that lead to a blessed life and business.
Listen in to hear Fortune share:
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We spend a lot of time in the SMA talking about the comparison as it relates to us as women. But we haven’t really dug into how we compare our kids to other kids. I’m noticing as Vinnie gets older that kiddie comparison is A THING.
I think some of the kiddie comparison trap stems from the same place as our own comparison trap: our own insecurities, poor self-worth, self-doubt as women and moms - and maybe some guilt, too??
In this episode, I dig into 5 ways to look at your child’s strengths, struggles, and phases a little differently. I share ways to focus on the power of perseverance, problem-solving, resourcefulness, and compassion over disparity, weaknesses, and fitting in.
I also encourage you to work on YOU. If you’re comparing your child to other children, you might have some Shameless work to do on yourself.
Let me know how this episode resonates with you and how you have seen kiddie comparison traps play out in your circles of moms.
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Julie Ciardi is a Shameless divorced and remarried mom of 3 kiddos. She divorced when her oldest two kids were 2 and 4. She remarried and now has a third child, age 4, with her new husband. She has a very modern blended family. She recently took a flying leap from corporate, leaving behind a high paying multi-six figure salary to be an entrepreneur with 2 businesses. She launched a brick and mortar women’s boutique, Haven Boutique, where she styles women for their daily hustle. Then she launched her podcast, Divorced Mommy to help divorced moms with their mindset and long-term vision to create the life they want and their children need.
Listen in to hear Julie share:
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I recently polled our Shameless Mom #everydamnday Facebook group, asking what you all needed help with right now. I got over a tons of responses and many of those responses had a lot of likes – letting me know that a lot of you are facing the same obstacles. But the most liked response was, “How to protect energy and boundaries so you still have joy during the holidays.”
This response was the most liked comment by a landslide.
Here’s the deal about the holidays – you have every right to create the experience you want.
You have every right to say NO.
You have every right to create space to rest.
You have every right to create more joy and less stress.
You have every right to make it all about you and your immediate family and not about a million other people.
You have every right to unapologetically set boundaries, protect your energy, and enjoy the heck out of yourself.
Here are 4 ways to protect your energy and build better boundaries so your next month can be more of a fairy tale and less of a nightmare. I’m going to dive into how to make space for the things and people you love, how to prioritize things that bring you joy, and how to actually RELAX over the holidays. Sound good?!?
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Heather Boorman lives an intensely joy-filled and full life as a homeschooling mom to 3 fringy kids and the executive director and therapist with Boorman Counseling. She passionately advocates for differently wired kids and adults through her work as a national speaker, writer & podcaster at The Fringy Bit. Heather’s also the author of The Gifted Kids Workbook, which provides mindfulness-based activities to help kids reduce stress, balance emotions, and build confidence.
Listen in to hear Heather share:
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Last week I gave a talk to Moms In Finance in Seattle and it was pure FIRE and GOLD. It was basically a combination of FIVE podcast episodes I’ve already done wrapped up into a 30-minute talk that will totally change how you turn your struggles into strengths and take power in your life to rewrite ALLLL the stories that are keeping you stuck as all get out.
Listen, we all have our “stuff”…..
And most of us let our “stuff” dictate our struggles. We let our “stuff” create stories in our heads that keep us stuck. We allow our “stuff” to hold us back from finding and thriving in our strengths.
How about we just stop?
Stop sitting in your stuff.
Stop settling for stuck.
Start shining your story.
Start standing in your strengths.
Listen in to hear exactly how.
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Rachel Rodgers is a woman of color, a mother of four and a seven-figure business owner -- in that order. Rachel started her career working as a lawyer with nonprofits, federal judges and Hillary Clinton.
Rachel is founder of Million Dollar Badass, a high-level Mastermind for women looking to take their businesses from 6 to 7 figures. She firmly believes all women should desire to become millionaires – because of the profound impact a woman’s money can make on the world.
Rachel is also my business coach. I adore her, even though she terrifies me on the reg by pushing me to think WAY bigger than I am comfortable with. Everyone woman needs a Rachel in her life. I can’t to share my Rachel with you.
Listen in to hear Rachel share:
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It was pointed out to me a few weeks ago that I might be the kind of person who makes up BIG stories in my head that are often UNTRUE.
This happens when I think someone might be mad at me or when I think I’ve been wronged or when anything feels unjust in my world.
I’m quick to make assumptions, jump to conclusions, and sometimes downright freak the heck out. And it’s often all for nothing. The story I created in my head was just that – a story – with no basis in reality.
Can anyone else relate?
So, the reason this happens is a thinking process called the Ladder of Inference. This is where we take in an experience or some sort of data and then filter it, determine it it’s a threat or a benefit to us, make assumptions, jump to conclusions, form beliefs and take action based on these beliefs.
I’m really good at climbing that damn Ladder of Inference super fast, which can totally mess up my head and sometimes my interactions with others. I know I’m not alone here. Listen in to hear how you might be climbing this ladder with me and how it’s potentially damaging your relationships and maybe even your upcoming holidays.
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Taryn Perry is a Shameless Mom of 4 and a 6 figure earner as a Beachbody coach. She became a Beachbody coach 10 years ago to prove the infomercials were a big fat lie and she lost 25 pounds and built a whole new career, replacing her 6 figure commercial real estate salary in just 3 years. Since then she has worked with multiple MLMs and in multiple fitness spaces as a Turbo Kick instructor, a CrossFit coach, a Boot Camp coach and a Core de Force instructor. She recently added nutrition credentials to resume as well. She never stops showing up for herself (at 4am) or her business, which has taken her to the top ranks of Beachbody and landed her on QVC with Tony Horton.
I’ve known Taryn for years and I’ve watched her do more in her MLM than any other woman I know. Given how many moms I know test the network marketing waters, I had to ask Taryn to come on the show and share her secrets.
Listen in to hear Taryn share:
Links Mentioned (go to shamelessmom.com and click on Ep 282 for clickable links):
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If you’re listening to this episode, you have been a part of my journey to 1 million downloads in some way and I can’t thank you enough. I did not get here alone. I got here because YOU listened, downloaded, subscribed, reviewed and shared this podcast. For that, I am beyond grateful.
Over the course of almost 300 episodes and over 1,000,000 downloads, I have learned some truly valuable lessons that apply to so many areas of life. I think you’ll be surprised at how much some of my lessons may apply to your life - today.
So, listen in as I share what I’ve learned when it comes to consistency, gratitude & grace, asking, and connecting. And then go practice these things in your own life #everydamnday. You might be blown away by the amazing places they take you.
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SMA Episode 199: The C Word You Need To Use Way More Often
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Courtney Shorter is the Owner and Event Designer at RyanMorgan Events and Soul Free Mamas, where she plans memorable events and retreats that bring people together… Courtney has always loved planning gatherings, parties, and yes...meetings! Fascinated by all the details in dressing up, dancing, the music, lights, the food, and the glamour. Much like a stylist helps her clients find the best garments to showcase the greatest versions of who they are; Courtney helps her clients throw the best party or event to exhibit the very best of what they have to offer.
Over the last few years, life has been a world wind of joy and pain but Courtney’s mission is always to find the joy... She loves to bring fun and help families find their joy. Her company, named after her twin angel babies, Ryan and Morgan, is built on a bedrock of love, a passion for what’s possible and a commitment to be an unstoppable force for good! As a way to honor her babies, after many years of event planning and heartbreak, she recently extended her business to empower women who have experienced infant loss, miscarriages, and/or women who are living with infertility. Courtney has created a powerful space for women that crave to be heard and supported along this lonely journey.
Listen in to hear Courtney share:
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Links Mentioned (clickable links are available if you go to shamelessmom.com and click on Episode 280):
A recent conversation in our Shameless Mom #everydamnday Facebook group stopped me in my tracks.
One Shameless Mom posted that she only got a couple hours of time to herself each month. And that her partner thought this was an appropriate amount of time – he didn’t see why she might need anymore.
I found this disconcerting.
But more disconcerting was the chorus of moms who commented saying they too didn’t get much if any, time to themselves on a regular basis.
MAMAS.
This is NOT ok.
Time to yourself is essential. Time spent serving no one but you is crucial.
Sacrificing regular time to yourself is sacrificing your true self and your basic need to cultivate your identity outside of the roles of mother and wife.
Whether its taking a bath, going out with girlfriends, getting a massage, sitting alone reading in a coffee shop, going to book club, taking a photography class, joining a knitting circle – you need time just for you.
And this time should not be a gift from your partner. This time should be a requirement of your relationship.
In this episode, I dig into these 4 steps to getting more time in your life:
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Heather Chauvin has been named the next generation’s thought leader in parenting and women’s leadership. Her mission is to crack women open to their deep potential and help them create the life their soul craves.
Heather is the creator of the New & Noteworthy Podcast, Mom Is In Control, and has been featured on/in the OWN network, Huffington Post, and various other media outlets. Through her Courageous Rewrite Initiative, Heather gives voice to many humans who courageously took inspired action to create lives they’re proud of.
With wit and wisdom, Heather inspires a global community of women to take back control of their lives and evolve how they lead, work, play, and parent.
Listen in to Heather share:
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I often tell people that my “mommy podcast” is not about momming. It’s no about how to potty train your kid or get through sleep training. It’s generally NOT parenting advice.
Except now.
Because I will shamelessly declare that there are a few instances in which I will use my platform to give parenting advice. Protecting your kids from predators and sexual violence is one of those instances.
A few weeks ago I released an episode titled, “How To Not Raise A Rapist.” After that episode, I got a number of messages asking, “What about our daughters? How do we protect our girls from predators.”
I immediately knew I needed to create this follow up episode. And this episode is not just about protecting your daughters. It’s about protecting girls and boys from predators.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
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Katie Krimitsos is a Shameless Mom, wife, adventurer, podcaster, business strategist, seeker and change maker. She's committed to brightening the light of women around the world - through her Biz Women Rock community, which supports Women Entrepreneurs - and now through Meditation for Women, guided meditations that are specifically created with the special journey of women in mind. These meditations are tools to help women reconnect with the divine wisdom already inside of each us so we may live our own, extraordinary lives.
I connected with Katie at an event after some light stalking… She had the most magnetic energy and I knew I wanted to connect with her. We ended up chatting and I immediately felt like I found a new friend. I am so excited to share her with you.
Listen in to hear Katie share:
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Like most women, I spent a lot of my life trying to blend in. I wanted to be the same as all the people around me. In fact, I hated that I had red hair and freckles for my entire childhood. I didn’t like looking different.
However, today, as a 42-year-old woman, mom, wife, entrepreneur, I LOVE standing out. I love being my own unique person. I love being recognized for what makes me different. I love my red hair and freckles (and I get super offended with certain skin care companies say they have creams to minimize/lighten freckles – WTF?!? Not cool.)
I’ve come a long way in owning my differences, embracing my oddities, and sharing my true self. And the result has been magical – as now I attract all the best people into my life.
When I was trying to blend in I had a lot of relationships that were NOT satisfying. Sometimes I felt misunderstood and like I needed to hide parts of myself.
No more.
Now I let my freak flag fly and the people I attract people have many of the same values as me, and often the same interests (Real Housewives, entrepreneurship, fitness, personal and professional development, mental health awareness). I actually build friendships around geeking out on common interests instead of pretending to like what someone else likes. And, it’s SO MUCH BETTER. Who knew???
Listen in to this episode to learn 4 ways you can let your freak flag fly and how flying your freak flag will change the dynamics of your relationships.
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Marina Pearson is a Shameless Mom to 3-year-old Leo, host on The Joy of Being Podcast, bestselling author and investor. Aside from being featured on/in ITV This Morning (in Europe), Marie Claire, The Guardian and The Daily Mail she lives her life working on projects that light her up. When she isn't spending time with her son at the beach in Javea Spain (where she lives) she is running exclusive Joyriding Retreats in Spain for women/mums in business who want to ditch the overwhelm or overseeing her investments, or hosting her Joy of Being Podcast where she interviews transformation professionals, business owners and creatives on how moms and women in business can live a life full of joy and freedom.
Listen in to hear Marina share:
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I’m guessing someone at some point told you something like, “If you take good care of yourself, you’ll be so much more able to take good care of others.”
Can we just call BS on this?!?
First of all, you are allowed to take good care of yourself because you damn well deserve it, not because you need to serve others better.
AND…
When is the last time anyone ever told a dude to take good care of himself so he could better serve others?
Ummmm, never.
You wear a million hats and serve others in a million ways.
But if you don’t serve yourself first, you won’t see the beauty in any of it.
You’ll be anxious, bitter, overwhelmed, exhausted, and uninspired to use your best gifts to their full capacity.
When you show up in any role do it FOR YOU.
Prove how strong you are FOR YOU.
Show how patient you are FOR YOU.
Let yourself cry FOR YOU.
Be assertive with your voice FOR YOU.
Share your time and energy FOR YOU.
Laugh out loud FOR YOU.
Become an artist FOR YOU.
Run a marathon FOR YOU.
Quit your job FOR YOU.
Go for the promotion FOR YOU.
The idea that you should take care of yourself so you can better take care of others is bullshit.
Take care of yourself because you are a hero, friend, mother, daughter, visionary, QUEEN, ruler, woman who damn well deserves to take care of yourself FOR YOU.
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